~hail to the sleeve~

Remember sleeves?  What ever happened to them?  They used to be all the rage!  There's all kinds of sleeves.  Long sleeves, short sleeves, capped and even three quarter sleeves.  I still wear them daily, but unfortunately I see them quickly disappearing.  I love sleeves!  I refuse to go without them!  Whoever invented the sleeve is a genius in my book!

All joking aside, I find myself browsing through websites or magazines and I feel the need to cover girls up with a blanket.  The only thing that seems to be more common than the missing sleeve is the severely short skirt accompanied by bare legs and mile-high heels.  I'm not judging.  Really, I'm not.  I understand the pressure to fit in.  I haven't always been a prude!  I too, tried to push the envelope where hemlines and necklines were concerned when I was a teenager - and I sometimes I succeeded. That's what kids do - they push limits.  And who could blame them when their role models - like Beyonce`, Miley Cyrus and Lindsay Lohan, just to name a few - are leading in the cause to abolish the sleeve (and most other parts of the dress)?

Parents are supposed to set limits.  That's our job.  And when our teenage girls come crying about how everyone is dressing that way or no one is wearing what we've bought her, our job is to hold on as tight as we can to the limits.  I'm not talking about never compromising.  Compromise has to happen at times.  Give in on style or color.  After all, (and I know this goes against everything we've been taught) sin is ugly, but ugly isn't a sin.  Modesty should not be compromised!   

I searched the Bible for counsel on the matter and here are a few of the verses I found on the subject of modesty:

Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control. - 1 Timothy 2:9a

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. - 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman without discretion. Proverbs 11:22

And as a parent, perhaps the most convicting verse of all...

But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea. “Woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the one by whom the temptation comes! Matthew 18:6-7

As the mom of a daughter, it frustrates me to fight against the "norm" on a daily basis.  I've been told (more than once) by well-meaning people that I can't protect her from everything.  This is so true.  I'm fully aware that I'm not capable of protecting her from everything.  That's actually not my intent - or my job.  God won't even choose to protect her from everything!  My job is to set limits and lead her, pointing her to Christ who will guide her by the Holy Spirit - if she will yield to Him, and to pray, pray, pray.  Modesty is not about covering up so no one will notice her (but would that be so bad? Ha!).  It's about the condition of the heart.  It's about obedience.  God's word is clear.  He expects obedience.  

As well as having a daughter, I'm also the mother of a pre-teen son (gulp).  The older he gets the more I notice the behavior of girls around him.  Girls have become significantly more forward since I was a girl!  Part of how girls relate to boys is in how they dress.

And behold, the woman meets him, dressed as a prostitute, wily (or deceptive) of heart. - Proverbs 7:10

Recently I was looking at pictures of kids who had attended a dance. (I'm not opposed to dancing, by the way:) ) It was a conversation with a friend about these pictures that inspired this blog post.  Pictures had been taken before leaving the house and the happy couple was all smiles.  After pics of the couple by themselves, there were group pictures of several friends and their dates.  When I looked at the group photo, I was amazed!  Each girl looked like the next!  Their dresses were almost identical - and they were all missing sleeves (and most were missing much more!).  The longer I looked at the picture, the harder it hit me.  These boys would be heading off to a dance where there would be hundreds of girls dressed just like this.  Hundreds!  In an attempt to normalize our daughters, we've put our sons in the middle of a no-win situation!

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart." - Matthew 5:27-28

I wonder if we realize what we're doing to our sons.  We train them to respect girls, then in the most awkward years of their life, when they're barely old enough to shave, we put them in a sea of scantily dressed girls their own age who've been dressed to look 10 years older and tell them to mind their manners.  Look but don't touch?  Matthew 5:27-28 tells us that's not good enough!  How is a boy suppose to keep his thoughts pure, let alone his actions, when he looks up and he's surrounded by a roomful of teenage girls dressed like sexy adult women?  Do we expect too much from our sons?  Or are we expecting them to give into sin, so we quit trying to keep the temptations away?  Grown men lose the battle with lust, and we throw our boys in the fight?  I've often heard "Boys will be boys".  Really?  We're giving them a pass on obedience because of their gender?  God never excludes anyone from accountability.

Please hear my heart.  I don't believe it's our intent to dress our daughters so as to require every ounce of self-control of every boy they cross paths with (and the prayers of their mamas), but I do think our society as a whole is clueless as to the reprecussions.   Our daughters are beautiful just the way God made them.  They don't know that unless we, as parents convey that to them - in our words and our actions.  After all, what's wrong with a fourteen year old that looks fourteen?  It's okay to dress up and look pretty - it's not okay to look sexy. 

For our daughters who are being told they're worthless unless they bare all (or most), and for our sons who battle daily against lust within their own hearts and minds - say you'll join me in the fight to retrieve the sleeve! 

Blessings,

~characters of character~

I'm proud of my kids (like most moms), but I don't want to sin or cause them to sin, by bragging (not that that always stops me!).  After praying about it, I've come to the realization that I'm not bragging on my kids - or on their parents, when I notice godly character in them, but on God and His work in their lives.

Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord."

It seems like after finding out I was pregnant with our first child, I had a fear of failure hanging over me.  Feelings of inadequacy and thoughts like, "What if we screw this kid up?" crept in many times over the years.  Over time, God has given me a peace about it.  Not that we'll do everything perfect, or that they'll be perfect or turn out just like I want them to, but that if I pursue godliness for myself and for my kids, God will be faithful to guide and direct our steps. He has, in fact, been faithful to do just that, and based upon past experience, I can only conclude that He will continue in His faithfulness.  Afterall, who wants our kids to be godly adults more than God, Himself?

     The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease.
                                                     Lamentations 3:22

There have been many questions we've asked God  to answer for us.  "Which doctor is trustworthy?  Which babysitter? Is it really okay to put them to sleep on  their belly?  Is it really okay to put them to sleep on their back?  Do we spank? Do we make them do chores?  What age is okay to spend the night with friends? Do we give them an allowance? Do we homeschool?  How do we homeschool?  How do we keep them safe?"  Time after time, God has answered our questions and put our minds and hearts at ease when we've been afraid of taking the next step -  afraid of messing up.

Lately, the kids have been in rare form.  Bickering has been at an all time high and egos and bad attitudes seem to be bursting at the seams!  Last week I was once again, questioning God.   "Are you sure we're supposed to homeschool?  Have I taught them anything good?"  I went to a place lower than I had been in a while.  To make it worse, these things weren't just happening at home.  Nothing stings worse than open sin.  It's easy to spot sin at home and deal with it before anyone knows about it.  When they choose to sin in front of people, it can quickly become about the embarassment instead of the sin.  After 14 years of parenting, this is still a challenge for me.

Knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope.                                                                                                                         Romans 5:3-4

Two weeks ago, at a bible study, while laughing with some women about R's odd sense of humor (he's just like his dad), G ended up making a hurtful comment to me, calling me 'critical' - in front of several people.  I laughed it off, but I was hurt and she would later get a lecture I'm sure she won't forget soon (unless, of course, she zoned out!).  It was apparent, after talking to her that she didn't intend to hurt me, she just spoke before she thought - something I'm guilty of often.  Quite frankly, her words weren't nice - but they were true and I needed to hear them.  God has spoken to me through my kids many times.
After praying about it, speaking with her and then sharing what happened with Glen, I dropped it.  I chalked it up as a learning experience and I left it alone.  Last week, however, someone who witnessed "the incident" brought it up.  I was mortified!  The same feeling of embarassment came over me that had the week before.  I immediately started thinking bad thoughts.  "What am I doing?  I'm a horrible parent!  Why am I a leader?  I can't even lead my own kids!"  Just when I was convinced God made a huge mistake by allowing me to be a parent, He began to show signs of growth.

      Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

  Proverbs 22:6

Friday night, I had a leader's meeting for bible study and G was singing with the choir at the Homecoming game.  I hated to miss it, but Glen and R were there.  In typical teenage fashion, G asked to sit with friends after she was done singing.  Later she shared with Glen that a friend of a friend came to sit with them and began cussing - "the really bad words!".  When Glen asked what she did, she said she told her, "Hey, I don't talk that way!"

Since allowing her to attend school a few hours a day, I've wondered how she would react in situations just like this.  I know she's far from perfect, especially in my critical eyes, but God is working in her.  She has always had a boldness about her, and still does when dealing with me, but I haven't seen that in a while in her friendships.  God allowed me to see that He's refining her, but not removing those qualities.  Speaking boldly to me has gotten her in trouble more than a few times, but if I give her a safe place to be bold (as long as she's respectful), then she's more likely to speak boldly when she's away from me.

Instead of playing in our town, R played soccer in a nearby town this year, with brand new coaches and brand new teammates.  He was so nervous on his way to his first practice, his hands were shaking!  The season has been wonderful!  They haven't won a game yet (there are 2 left), but we've seen him step up and be a leader on the team - and his gift of encouragement shines on the field!  He's the first to give a "great job!" or "nice shot!" to a teammate.  I've seen God stretch him this season, but use him as well.

Last week we received a call that R had made the allstar team.  He's made the allstar team for several years in our town, but playing in a new town in front of all new faces, we warned him to not get his hopes up.  When the call came, we were all so proud of him!  Even G was yelling out, "Awesome!" and giving high fives!  When Glen spoke to the coach, he said, "We've taken notice of R.  He's a fantastic goalkeeper."  Words that would swell any dad's chest.  What an honor it is to be recognized for being good at what you love to do!  While we were excited for him, we were quick to warn him of the dangers of pride.

While we're proud of him for his accomplishments, perhaps the best words came today.  I took R to his first allstar practice and after meeting the coach, was told, "R is a very hard worker.  He has outstanding character on the soccer field."  I thanked him, then immediately gave thanks to God for His faithfulness.  God is faithful to show us where He's working when we ask.  Just when I allowed myself to think God wasn't working, He proved again that His work isn't evident overnight.  Thankfully He allows mistakes and He works through imperfect people like us.

Just to keep me humble and prove to me that the work is His and not mine, as soon as we got in the car, R was in a terrible mood and wouldn't speak almost our entire 45 minutes home. In my mind I was thinking, "If only that coach could see you now!"  God was gracious enough to allow this episode to be private.  He is faithful!

       Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.

                                                                           1 Peter 5:7

It's silly to think I could do more for my kids than the Holy Spirit, but keeping the responsibility resting entirely on my shoulders instead of giving it to God is, in effect thinking just that. 

Parenting isn't for wimps!  Some weeks (or months) feel like a roller coaster ride with lots of hills, valleys and sharp turns.  Then there are periods of what feels like running in place - lots of energy spent, but no ground gained.  It's also not meant to be done alone, in our own strength.  Knowing that God is directing each step is the only thing that makes it worth while.  Only He can see the finish line.  He is faithful!  We just have to keep the goal in mind and daily surrender ourselves to Him and His plan for our lives and the lives of our kids.

Blessings,
,

~stunted growth~

Several weeks ago, my husband began preaching through the book of Genesis.  I must confess to you, I wasn't thrilled.  While I didn't grow up in church, since becoming a Christian over 17 years ago, I have taught countless lessons and craft projects about creation and the fall of man to numerous preschoolers!  What could be left to learn, right?  Wrong!

I think it's interesting that when God told Adam and Eve that they had done wrong, Adam blamed Eve and she blamed the serpent.  Neither wanted to acknowledge their sin - and neither sorry.  Fast forward to chapter 4.  Cain murders Abel because Abel's offering is pleasing to God and his isn't.  When God tells Cain of his punishment, he is clearly upset over the punishment, but not repentant.  God tells him he'll be a wanderer, yet he builds a city - and names it for his son.  Disobeying God and keeping the glory for man instead of giving glory to God.  Later, Cain's great great great grandson, Lamech killed two men.  When he confessed his sin to his wives, he said, "If Cain's revenge is sevenfold, then Lamech's is seventy-seven fold."  Lamech confessed his sin.

In my quiet time recently, God has revealed big truths in tiny bites.  Today He layed it on thick!  Am I truly repentant?  Am I sorry for the sins I commit, or am I sorry I've been caught or sorry I'll be punished?  When God reveals sin in my life, I usually let life's busyness be my excuse.  I can't count the times I've thrown together unhealthy meals for my family at the last minute or put quiet time with God on the back burner because our family schedule filled up before I squeezed it in.  What am I teaching my children through my disobedience?  It's easy to see through the book of Genesis that unconfessed sin can become generational sin.  Nothing would grieve my heart more than to know that I have stunted my children's growth in the Lord.

How many times have you heard a parent encourage their child to lie so they don't get in trouble?  It happens, though I'm sure they wouldn't call it lying.  It's deception nonetheless. Sometimes the consequences are too great for Mom and Dad to bear.  If little Johnny admits that he vandalized cars in the school parking lot, he won't get to play football.  If Sally tells Mary that she took her baby doll, Mary won't want to be her friend anymore.  It sounds ridiculous, but it happens!  While these are extremes, and most of us can never imagine allowing things like this to go on, we probably can imagine not grounding our four year old from television because it would mean I wouldn't have that 30 minutes during Dora to clean up the kitchen, or not taking away the Nintendo DS, because it keeps him quiet in the car on the way to Grandma's.  When we allow half-hearted repentance to us without consequences, we're setting our kids up to half-heartedly obey God.

Please don't think this post is about my terrible, disobedient children - far from it.  They're great!  I couldn't ask for better kids!  This is about me.  I've given excuses to God time and time again, like 'I can't help it', 'I'm under too much pressure', 'we're so busy' and I'm sure God's favorite is 'You know how I am....'  The problem is that God is never okay with an unrepentant heart.

While I can never perfect my walk with God, and I can't protect my kids from all sin, I can teach them to be repentant and graciously accept God's correction so He is glorified in their obedience.

The question is not if I sin or how often.  Obviously I'm not perfect and never will be, but what kind of example am I setting when I know I'm sinning and refuse to stop, or let my day dictate my attitude instead of standing firm on the Word?  Do I stop and call upon the name of the Lord?

God is continually sanding down the rough edges of my heart and molding me into who He wants me to be.  It's my belief that, besides the Holy Spirit, there is no better tool for transforming the heart than that of a child entrusted to you.  My heart's desire is to submit to Him fully in obedience, for my own sake - and the good of my kids.

Blessings,

~things are buzzing around here~

It seems that lately when I think about blogging, I think of ten other things I have to get done first!  There is much to do, but I simply had to write about our recent happenings! 

Because we homeschool our kids, we look for activities that include socializing and learning.  One of the ways we've been able to incorporate both is through 4H.  We've participated for three years and have loved it!  Our kids have taken welding and sailing classes and Grayson is taking sewing.  It really is a great resource.  Last year, a man in our club offered to teach beekeeping.  I must be honest.  I was completely fascinated and scared all at the same time!  I tried my best to talk my kids into signing up, but they were both totally against it.  It does sound crazy, but it's great science!  This year however, I put my foot down.  I told them they were taking it.  No options - 'cuz I'm Mom and I say so.  I knew after they got over their initial fears, they would have fun and they eventually began to love the idea!  No compaints at all.

The morning of their first meeting I had leader's meeting for Bible Study Fellowship, but I arrived home by 9 am.  Their meeting was at 10.  As I prepared to head out the door, Glen jumped up and said I could stay home and he would take them.  Obviously I wasn't staying home!  I was going!  So we all went.  All of the other kids in the class had taken it last year, so they were preparing to have hives of their own.  When we were asked, I thought we would just observe and learn, but Glen said, "No, let's get a hive!  What better way to learn?"  So we began preparing.  We looked up boxes and plans and he had full intentions of making a box, however life got busy.  Glen is taking two classes this semester, plus he has a full-time job as well as his ministry.  He went out of town 3 out of 4 weeks last month and we had a church member who became ill and passed away.  Before we knew it, it was time to pick up the bees and we had no box.  Glen quickly checked around and found a man 2 1/2 hours away who builds bee boxes.  Last Saturday (after an all day class for Glen and Grayson's basketball game) we made a quick trip to pick it up.

We finally arrived at our leader's house to pick up our bees at 9:30 pm.  I know they must have been thrilled that we waited until the absolute last minute!  When I saw the bees, once again I was amazed at these little creatures!  The queen hung inside a box and literally thousands (12,000 - 15,000 to be more precise!) of bees were clustered around her - protecting her.  There were even a few on the outside of the box who were focused and hanging on.  As our leader placed the bees in our car (yes, inside), Riley jumped out of the car crying, "I hate bees!"   It never occured to me that this would be such a major thing!  We got him calm enough to get home, but he sat on the edge of his seat the whole way.  Just in case he needed to jump out, I guess!  I was thinking, "are we crazy?"

After arriving home, the kids and I went inside while Glen dealt with the bees.  He did a super job!  He borrowed gloves and a hat with a vail from our leader.  I duct taped all of the edges of his clothing so bees didn't get in.  I wish I had pictures, but it was 10 pm and we were ready to be done!  After hanging the queen inside of our new box, he dumped the box of bees in the new bee box and headed inside - but not unscathed.  He managed to get stung - though only once, on his calf.

Obviously we knew there would be stings.  We've all been stung before, so we knew no one was allergic.....famous last words.  Glen woke up Sunday morning with major pain in his calf and it was swollen.  Sunday evening he got nauseous and ran a low grade fever.  Monday morning he couldn't put any weight on it, so he went to the doctor and was given a round of steroids and anti-biotics to take.  Last night, he laid on the couch and just had me rub it for what seemed like forever, because it itches. 
I know you're thinking we immediately got rid of the bees.  I must confess, I thought that's the way this story would end.  It would make since, right?  I even talked to the kids and prepared them for it.  Obviously if you're allergic to bees, you don't own any!  I mean, that's why we don't have a cat, for goodness sake!  Last night, I talked to Glen to see what he wants to do.  He's not your average guy.  "Just wait", he said.  Wait?  For what?  Wait to see how it goes.  Don't rush the decision.  One non-life threatening allergic reaction doesn't mean you're allergic.  Typical Glen.  Putting the kids before himself.  So we're waiting....

Meanwhile, we're getting attached to the bees - even Riley.  Yesterday he called me on his cell phone from across the street.  He was so excited, "Mom, our bees are in their garden!!!".  I'm not quite sure how he knew they were ours, but I'm glad they're already at work!  Glen even mowed the yard in shorts tonight, so I guess he's not afraid to get stung again.  Let me just state the obvious by saying if I had been the one to get stung and have that reaction, the bees would be gone!  In a New York minute.  Just sayin'.

Blessings,

~the great christian cover-up~

It's been awhile since I've blogged, but this week I've had something on my mind.  What is our main job as Christians?  To make disciples?  How are we to do this if we're not real about our own struggles?  Also, how can we be held accountable if we keep our struggles a secret?

If you've read many of my blogposts, you know I didn't grow up in church.  Far from it, in fact.  I was born out of wedlock to a teenage mom and my mom became a Christian the same year I did.  I was twenty one - she was 39.  When my mom found out she was pregnant at age 17, she also found out that my dad had gotten another girl pregnant.  He married the other girl.  I have a half-sister who's 15 days older than me.  I say this to say that, while human nature takes over and we all have tendencies to hide our mistakes and put our best face forward, I have never had a desire to pretend things are perfect.  For the most part, what you see is what you get.  I have some struggles that I deal with that I share openly, and I have more private struggles that only a close few know about.  I try to share everything with Glen in an attempt to be held accountable, but I don't think that's the norm for most Christians.  The longer I'm a Christian, the more "plastic" people I meet.  You know, the kind that seem like they have it all together and always have!  (I should also say that I have met many wonderful, authentic Christians who have opened up and let me in their world).  I don't say this to judge, it's definitely only because of the path God set me on that I tend to be more transparent by nature (sometimes to a fault!).  I spent my entire childhood embarassed that my parents weren't married, but when your last name isn't the same as your dad's and your sister is your same age, you have to be upfront with people.  I'm sure I tried to cover it up from time to time (and I definitely didn't approach the subject first), but there came a time when I realized it wasn't my mistake and I shouldn't be embarassed by it.  (This excludes having to tell my kids when they were old enough to understand.  I definitely wanted to pretend everything was perfect for them). 

Over time, however, I came to another realization - we all make mistakes, and not only should I not be embarassed by them, I should glory in the fact that God rescued me from that and I should be upfront with everyone.  I should not only share about my past, but about my current struggles as well.  People need to see that other Christians are real people.  While it's not always appropriate to share every struggle while you're in the midst of it, it is appropriate to share that God is dealing with you in a certain area - and it's always appropriate to share after God has brought you out of it!  I'm still treading lightly on this path where my kids are concerned.  I definitely want to be real with them, but I don't want to over-share regarding my past.  So far, God has given me words to speak to them.  I can only trust that He'll continue to do so.

Recently I learned of a boy from my childhood who is involved in a very sinful lifestyle.  This is someone that was raised in a Christian home.  I was saddened when I read his blogpost that said the first time he went to a gay bar alone, he ran into a pastor from church camp.  This seemed somehow to put the stamp of approval on it - almost normalizing it.  I've never walked in his shoes and I don't presume to know all of the ends and outs of homosexuality.  I only know what I learned from the gay men my mom worked with as a hairdresser, and that the Bible says any kind of sex outside of marriage is wrong. 

Yesterday I read that the Executive Director of the Missouri Baptist Convention gave his resignation for "immoral acts with a woman".  While I'm not surprised (not because I know this to be in his character, but because he's a human being),  it seems like one more scar on the church.  One more excuse people will give for "the church" letting them down. 

None of us are perfect, but do we convey that enough to other believers, and unbelievers for that matter?  How do we get rid of the myth that Christians are perfect?  How, in trying to live a life, holy and pleasing to God, do we really get across the fact that we are only holy because of the blood shed on our behalf?   It's probably evident, but let me say out loud that I seriously screw up on a daily basis.   If you're lifting me up as someone to be like, you need to raise your bar - I'm way off the mark!

"If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:8-9

While praying about both of these situations, God began to lay on my heart that this is the very reason we are to be transparent.  If I am not willing to share my story of how God has gotten me through the trials in my life and in the process, help out a fellow believer, what exactly is the purpose in Him getting me through them?  These are also reasons to have an  accountability partner.  Satan does his best work where there are secrets.  In both of the cases above, men in the ministry not only sinned, but led someone else into deeper sin.  Recognizing our weaknesses and having someone to hold us accountable are key.

So while I don't usually put on a fake face and pretend things are perfect, after thinking about the previous situations, I'm feeling convicted for covering up for other people.  A very close member of my family is participating in a lifestyle I don't want my kids around.  The issue is not whether I'll let her see my kids.  I will, I just don't want her lifestyle flaunted in front of them.  I have let her see the kids at our house or in public, as long as there's no mention of what she's doing.   As I'm thinking about transparency and "being real", I'm wondering if I'm doing the right thing.  I can only pray that I am.  Do I let them know what she's doing and that I don't agree with it, thus using her as an example or do I pretend everything's fine for now in order to protect her reputation?   I don't want to make her look bad, but my fear is that my kids will find out anyway and not know that I stood against what she was doing.  Oh Lord, let my motives be pure and pleasing to You!
 Blessings,

~do not disturb~

God is doing big things.  I don't mean to say He's beginning big things, but that I'm beginning to recognize big things.  As Christians, we can jump in and allow God to use us in His big plans, or we can sit idly by and watch God use others to accomplish what He wants.  What a tragedy that we sit too often!

Friday, Glen took half the day off of work so he could run errands for Soleful Saturday, an event our church organized to collect old shoes for The Shoeman Water Project.  He needed to pick up the Jump 'n Space and pick some things up at Sam's Club - both about 30 minutes away.  The kids and I spent the afternoon at homeschool co-op and by the time we were done, Glen was almost back to town so we met him at the church to help him unload. 

After all the food was unloaded, Glen and the kids began pulling the Jump 'n Space out of his truck (which was comical).  He saw a man walking up the street and came inside to ask me for cash.  The man had come by earlier and talked with him.  He told him his name was David and that he was homeless and out of money.  He has a job, but it's 20 minutes away and he doesn't have a car or a place to stay.  Someone he's been riding with was letting him stay with him, but they aren't letting him stay there anymore - he didn't go into the details of that.  Glen didn't have any cash (as usual), but told him to come by between 5 and 6.  It was 4:15.  Let me just say....the fact that this man caught anyone at our church is a miracle in and of itself.  Our church is a small church with a small congregation.  My husband is a bi-vocational pastor, so he isn't there during business hours, and he's the only paid employee (besides the people who clean the church once a week).  While there are people who come and go occasionally to make copies for their class or practice their songs, no one's there on a regular basis.

I had ten dollars on me, so I gave it to Glen.  Glen met the man outside and they talked for a long time.  I called a local motel for prices and Glen drove him there.  We invited him back for Soleful Saturday so we could at least feed him again.  The rest of the evening was busy with last minute things to do.  The next morning was my BSF leader's meeting, so I was up bright and early.  After my meeting, I picked up face paint and headed home to change.  Glen and the kids were already at the church moving tables outside, setting up the Jump 'n Space and setting the stage (or front porch as it's been called for many years!).  Once I got there, I began making tea and lemonade.  People from our church (and even a few friends) filtered in and jumped right in to help! 

As the music started and the hot dogs cooked, I wondered if David would come.  Later, about halfway through the event, he showed up.  As I saw him walking up the street, I was so relieved to see him!  As a church, it's our job to help those in need, but so often the church is taken advantage of.  Many get a little help then never come back.  It's for this reason that our town has a mission that most of the churches donate to.  This way, they can just refer people to the mission when they're asked for help.  A good thought, but here's the problem.....when David needed a place to stay, the mission was full.  All of the places we referred him to were full.  He had exhausted his resources!   It's our job to help.  Period.  Yes, let's be discerning and not give God's money to people we know for sure are taking advantage, but if we don't give because we're "afraid" of what they may spend it on, some will most definitely fall through the cracks.  What about them?  Jesus said, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me."- Matthew 25:40



  I think He is shaking His head at the ones that think they have it figured out.  It's as if they're saying, "Just jump through all of these hoops and if you can pass the test, you've earned the money."  That's how it seems at times.  The early church took care of each other.  They sold all of their possessions and lived together.  They shared their earnings.  There weren't some in the church driving Hummers while some drove Kias.  They shared their wealth - or lack of it. 

Please don't misunderstand!  I know that this is a different time.  Followers of Christ were shunned from their families.  They were left without an inheritance or land.  They weren't allowed to sell in the marketplace.  I know it's a different time, but shouldn't we still bring them into the fold and take care of one another?  Too often we stand at a distance and judge the choices they've made.  We're all just a few choices away from where David is....and some end up homeless by no choice of their own at all.  Many have lost jobs and homes over ailing health or corporate down-sizing. 

David was one of the last ones to leave last night.  He stayed and carried in tables and lugged tea pitchers up the stairs.  He worked hard.  When Glen left, he drove David back to the motel.  This morning, David did not come to church.  We prayed for him, but I thought we had seen him for the last time.  We took up a special offering just in case, though.  When the service was over and people began to leave, David came in.  He had been waiting outside so he didn't "disturb" us!  Are you kidding me?  Is this the message the church is sending?  Do Not Disturb?  Wow!  We assured him he most definitely would not have disturbed us - that we would've LOVED to have him worship with us!  He then began to comment on what he was wearing.  That he wasn't dressed for church. This is why I love God!  He totally uses us when we don't know we're being used.  Riley was laying down in a pew waiting on us to get done talking.  We couldn't see him from where we were, but he raises his leg straight up in the air and says, "It doesn't matter what you wear.  Look, I'm just wearing jeans!"  Too funny!

After Glen talked with him privately, David came out of his office crying.  He couldn't believe our church had helped him.  He made the comment that people of "his own race" hadn't helped.  We gave him a bottle of water and offered a few more to take with him.  He took one but said no to the others.  People would think he was a "hobo".  I thought that was interesting.  Still a man with pride.  It's true that people judge based on appearance.  It also seems as if the more you have, the more we're willing to give you.  Helping someone that actually needs help doesn't happen too often.

David explained that he's going to be trying to stay in the town where he works - which is sensible so he won't need a ride to work, but that probably means we won't see him again.  Glen gave him his business card to call us if he has any problems, and he promised to take up for Glen if he heard anyone bad-mouthing him or our church (not sure why he said that, but I LOVE it!).  On his way out the door, Grayson handed him a Bible to take with him.  He promised her he'd read it. 

Our family and our church family will continue to pray for David.  As soon as David left, the kids remembered they had two donuts left from this morning.  They grabbed them in a hurry and ran them outside to him but he was gone.  Nowhere to be found.  Coincidence?

Please know that I share this, not to lift us up in any way, but as a reminder that we are surrounded by people who need practical help, if we'll only see them with Jesus' eyes.

Yes, God is definitely doing big things.  Not because of us, but through us if we'll allow Him to.

Blessings,

~shoes, water and elvis~

What in the world do shoes have to do with clean water?  Well, last year, my brother told me of an organization near him that collects old shoes, sells them by the pound to retailers in developing countries, then uses the money made to purchase drills for digging wells.  My brother manages a gym and they were working with this ministry, The Shoeman Water Project, and collecting shoes from their members.

I thought this would make an awesome service project for our homeschool group, but Glen said we should get the church involved.  It's been a year, but we've finally gotten it together!  Saturday, October 23 will be "Soleful Saturday" at Community Baptist Church.  If you live in the area, please join us!  Everything starts at 2pm.  We'll have a bounce house for the kids, hot dogs and at 3pm, The Pullen Family will take the stage (or the porch, actually).  After the Pullen's, The praise band, "1-4-G" will lead us in a time of worship.  If you don't want to stay, but just want to drop off your shoes, that's also possible.  We'll have many eager hands waiting to take your shoes as you drive up. 

Today is Blog Action Day and the topic is clean water.  If you'd like to blog about this subject, just link up here.

I must confess, God is working on me.  I think I've been oblivious for far too long.  It's easy to ignore problems of others and focus on my daily struggles (which are NOTHING in comparison).   God has been dealing with me in this area for a little while.  I blogged a little about it here and here.  A few weeks ago, Grayson and I went to a Christian concert.  The Make a Difference Tour, with Max Lucado, Third Day, Michael W. Smith, and Toby Mac.  I knew there would be an opportunity to adopt a child, so Glen and I discussed it and felt it was worthwhile.  We have thought about it before, but wondered where the money would come from - the last thing we wanted to do was leave a kid with no help.  This time, we thought the same thing, but God seems to be telling us to take the step so He can show us how He can provide.  World Vision helps families in developing countries with clean water and food - specifically families effected by AIDS.  I prayed throughout the night for God to point me to the child He had for us.  To make sure I walk up to the right worker and that the first child's folder she took out, would be ours.  When I walked up to her, there was a man flipping through all of the folders and then handed them back and said he would look at more at the table.  What was he looking for?  When it was my turn, she asked if we wanted a boy or a girl.  I knew it had to be a boy.  Riley has been asking for a brother since he was 4!  The first folder she handed me had the meanest little face on it!  Scowling like he definitely did not want his picture made.  When I looked at his name, I could feel God's sense of humor - Elvis.  Elvis!  How sweet!  He's from Kenya and has 3 siblings and a single mom.  No dad.  Such a familiar story.  When I broght the folder home and showed Riley, the first thing he said was, "He looks really mean!".  Well, we'll tell him all about Jesus. 

I have to say, every time I hear about "Elvis" - you know...Presley, I think about our Elvis.  Elvis from Kenya - and I'm reminded to pray for him.  Every time I pray for him, I can't help but smile.

If you would like to learn more about sponsoring a child, visit World Vision on the web.

For too many years I thought I didn't have enough time or money to help.  God is showing ways that don't require "too much", but do require me.

Blessings,

~don't cry over broken.....glass?~

We have a neighbor who's a young mom of two.  She's in the process of a divorce and she's recently gone back to school.  I know she must be exhausted, but I usually can't think of many ways to help.  Since we homeschool, I don't have much free time to give.

Last week, she was mowing her lawn and her mower broke mid-lawn.  There was just this giant square of tall grass in the middle of her front yard.  I felt so bad for her, but thought her dad would help her out.  A few days later, Glen offered to mow it for her on Friday when he mowed ours.  What an opportunity to teach our kids to reach out.  I was so proud of Riley!  While Glen used the weed-eater, Riley mowed her lawn.  Everything was going just as Glen had planned, until a stick or rock flew up and busted out the back windshield of my car. 

Uggh!  What are you gonna do?  Right after our discussion about the money we need to put back for our trip to Chicago in November (for my brother's wedding), and the shower I'm giving his fiance in October, and well, let's not forget Christmas......BAM!

The hardest part was the initial conversation.  I heard Glen tell Riley to wait on the porch and "whatever you do, don't come in."  As he began to tell me the story of what happened, I jumped to conclusions and thought Riley was hurt.  I began to tear up, only to find out it was only the window.  I think that may have been his plan:)

Glen cleaned up the glass and covered the opening as neatly as he could with a trash bag (until we bought a drop cloth, which was much better) and bright green tape (Hey!  It's what we had!).  I wasn't embarrassed (okay, maybe a little),  but it was so annoying.  It was really noisy and every time I picked up speed, it inflated like a parachute!

Monday morning, I was taking Grayson to orchestra class at the junior high and we couldn't hear each other over the racket in the back!  I said, "I'm really sorry about this Grayson.  I know it's embarrassing to be dropped off with a trash bag on the window."  Words cannot begin to describe my feelings regarding her reaction.  She said, "Why would I be embarrassed?  This is just life, Mom.  No biggee".  What did she say?  Are you kidding me?

Glen and I talked about her reaction and he said, "Would you have been embarrassed at her age?"  I don't know.  I hope not, but I see so much shallowness on television, that I guess I made the assumption that she would be.  Shame on me! 

The neighbor bought our family pizza for helping her!  What a blessing!  The window was fixed yesterday, and even though I would rather have not spent the money on a new window, we got a good deal on it (Thanks, God) and I learned a little something about my daughter - and me.  Lessons don't come cheap around our house:) 

Blessings,